Tuesday, April 29, 2003

masturbation in E# *

you string me out
like dirty hotel linen
where rooms go
hour by hour

*also in my thesis

Monday, April 21, 2003


pain sharpens pleasure
brings me into you,
into me as we lie
entangled with
half-lidded eyes
caressing pain points
with soft fingertips
pressing bruises
harder, teeth
scraping necks
soft gentle thighs
with grasping hands
insistent lips
clashing teeth
so beautiful

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

wishful thinking*

just once, i would love to stare
into that abyss of pooled silver,
that mirror, and see nothing
but myself. no imperfections or
indiscretions, simply me.
nothing more.

*this poem also made its way into my thesis.

Friday, April 11, 2003

"not bad for something completely unlike you"

my hands are
jagged, rough
peeling from
the way i treat you
like i push you
some things
always reflect.
my hands have become a mirror,
and i do not like the reflection
that i see.
my soft, gentle hands -
how i miss them
it has been years, and
i am tired of shoving you away
of palming and pushing
while longing to pull towards
me, to be embraced.
of course, the city
enfolds me in its comfort
the bars, the lively darkness
lights leaping, yet i
am utterly alone
so alone.

Thursday, April 10, 2003

alphabet the exercise

all buried, cold, dead
equilibrium frozen, gone.
heat immigrates
joy, kataclysmic
loved much, now omega-ed.
terrified, undying
verified while xactly

Wednesday, April 9, 2003

nothing more, i swear

she startles in front of me,
and i find myself trying
not to become her past.
i overcome emotions
with mere iron will
swing into place
the deadened smile
i will not languish
after you.

she comes to brush my shoulder
with her fingertips,
telling me she
saw me from far away
uneasy smile
beautiful skirt, face, body.
i turn and walk away.

Tuesday, April 8, 2003


she sits in silence
thoughts pour across her small face,
as an open book.

and i know it impossible
for her mouth to tongue the affirmative
to kiss the yes of her lips