comprehension comes slowly

her eyes met mine
and for the first time,
she really saw me
straight through the layers
and bare into the center

i saw a flicker of comprehension
and that's all i really needed
i just wanted her
to see that pain
acknowledge the reality

it wasn't an admission of fault, or
an apology i was searching for
simply requiem in her eyes.

ideal kind

the way you move,
tracing shapes in the air
that only you can see,
and the lazy way you turn
my head to kiss me
and i love you, i do
when you touch me
with those hands and
whisper in my ear -
love, you do things
to me i'd never do to myself.
masochist that i am, i
have not the heart for these things.