Wednesday, October 12, 2005

do not deny *

the message
gets mangled in the afterglow.

the glint of white, iris, pupil
that flicks to your eyes, arms,
[guiltily into] eyes

cannot become the cure,
or the substitute
for the blade
you’ve taken to your crying veins.

nothing can be.

you have
tasted a poison sweetly sinister
it settles into you
nothing else
will do.

let the red
run. coping systems die hard, or
seldom do. the virus goes under-
ground, unchecked,
unnoticed for

until you find yourself again
crouching down, spilling your blood.

how, then, do you
learn to let it go?
vividly visual wristual evidence
that screams out no, i
am not okay.
(thank you
for noticing)

how do you live
without it?
the familiar
burning ritual,
the nod
to the fuckup inside?

stand straight,
tall, proud.

bear your scars.

*senior thesis poem

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