pissing on a stick
did not alleviate
my concern, merely
provoke a period of pausing -
waiting to bleed, or
failing that,
any appointment
to scream out,
what the hell
is wrong with me
inside i feel
something insidious,
really wrong,
much like the first time
before i bled out
what would have been
our child -
the bleeding that
will not come,
the imbalance
of body
and i, yes
am terrified
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